Today I met with someone I know, but knew little about. I was pointed in her direction after speaking with the church about my struggles with my dad and my uncle and God. They said she had similar childhood experiences and with Gods help had come to a place of forgiveness so she would not …
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God only takes the good ones?
Today I heard a song that I sang over and over and over during the 3 weeks while my dad was in intensive care. I’m a christian and when dad was ill the church rallied round. This song became my anthem. Lyrics: I’m gonna sing, in the middle of the stormLouder and louder, you’re gonna …
Taking stock
A strange thing happened today. Last night I took some sleeping tablets and went to bed early. I awoke at 11am to my phone ringing. I ignored it as I had only just woken up. Then my phone pinged. I saw that I had multiple messages from a close friend and a few messages and …
The tree that people hid.
Someone once told me that their past events, belief systems and thoughts were like a baby elephant that they walked round on a rope. Constantly dragging the massive load around with them day in day out. They said that their life got easier when they realised that they could live more easily if the elephant …
Nature trump’s Nurture
Over 5,000 years ago, homo sapiens began to use language to communicate their needs and wants with each other. I’m assuming that their new found communication style was rewarding as language continued to develop to current day. Language and communication styles are still evolving, with the advent of social media and emojis. It seems the …
Time doesn’t heal
Hi, it’s me Today marks 6 short months without you. It feels like only yesterday that you were ripped from our lives. This day 6 months ago was the toughest of my life. The night before, I had fallen asleep hopeful for the future and eager to hear you speak again. The morning brought news …
Start the fans…
I’m in a bad place. My thoughts are difficult to connect. There are so many of them racing round that it’s hard to pick just one. (Think of the crystal maze and the final dome sequence). Once you finally grab a thought and listen to it, and start to process it, bam, more start hitting …
Into the wild I was released…
I’m trying to sleep but my mind is whirring like an out of control spinning top. Yesterday someone I haven’t known very long said 5 simple words to me – It Was Not Your Fault – but they didn’t just say the words. They looked me in the eyes, they connected with the scared little …
Let me tell you a story
I’m going to tell you a story of a girl i used to know and what she had to deal with growing up…. its not pleasant, it traumatized her. This girl grew up in a loving family home, with her mother, father and younger brother. She had a large extended family, some of which she …
Petition
Today I sent the divorce petition off to my ex husband’s solicitor to approve. I wasn’t bothered about the divorce but he was adamant. He didn’t want to pay and I could get it free. Ive been forced to petition on the grounds of his unreasonable behaviour and I’m scared that there will be consequences …
Shrink(ing) Violet 
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