A blog about mental health, self harm, suicide, grief and trauma. Join me as i explore the inner workings of my brain
I caved. I gave in to my current greatest urge last night. I just needed to stop the constant thoughts spiraling in my head. I figured if I just do it then it will quieten down. I decided at around 4pm that I was going to do it. I dropped my daughter off with her …
Continue reading “How bad is bad enough? An insight to baby cut syndrome.”
I’m a sucker for a metaphor… Tonight whilst I was walking home down an unpopulated street, I came across an empty drinks can being blown by the wind to some unknown location. I felt that can. I felt the helplessness and anxiety it felt. Its so scary being thrown by an unknown force to an …
Continue reading “Today I made friends with a travelling can…”
Im struggling and today I did something I havnt done in a few months… I got high. For a few blissful hours I was joyful, for the first time in a long time I was actually enjoying life. The highs were interspersed with lows however, and this is where I noticed something very interesting. I …
The one hour a week I see my counsellor is the only hour where I feel I lose control of my thoughts and feelings. Sometimes even I’m surprised at what comes pouring out from me because the rest of the time it’s buried so deep within my soul that even I can’t reach it. Somehow, …
Do you ever stop to think about how what you say affects others? I’m trying to be mindful about the words I use and what the recipients might ‘hear’ instead. See, I’ve had lots of people this year talking to me about lots of different issues. The times when I’ve felt better are usually the …
Today I met with someone I know, but knew little about. I was pointed in her direction after speaking with the church about my struggles with my dad and my uncle and God. They said she had similar childhood experiences and with Gods help had come to a place of forgiveness so she would not …
Shrink(ing) Violet 