I’ve not spoken about this topic to others before now for a few reasons. Lately, the experience has been intensifying and feeling less like ‘me’ as I’ve been doing pretty well. So I figured, heck, why not open up to you guys… What are intrusive thoughts you might ask?They are thoughts that are usually damaging …
Tag Archives: counselling
I don’t deserve the sunshine’s rays…
It’s 2.30am and I just cannot get to sleep! I’ve been doing really well since Christmas. I’ve only had one self harm relapse and it was only a baby cut. Today I’m having a bit of a wobble. I’ve seen it coming for a couple of days but held myself together. On Wednesday I saw …
Today I made friends with a travelling can…
I’m a sucker for a metaphor… Tonight whilst I was walking home down an unpopulated street, I came across an empty drinks can being blown by the wind to some unknown location. I felt that can. I felt the helplessness and anxiety it felt. Its so scary being thrown by an unknown force to an …
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The turning of the calendar does not start a new story and so it continues;
I’ve never really enjoyed new year celebrations. I’ve always seen them as a prompt to reflect on the past year and generally I’ve found reasons to be sombre. I’ve either not achieved my goals or I’ve struggled with my mental health. I long to be reflecting on what a waste the year has been. All …
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Dissociation in mental health Vs drug induced dissociation (an accidental experiment) 😂
Im struggling and today I did something I havnt done in a few months… I got high. For a few blissful hours I was joyful, for the first time in a long time I was actually enjoying life. The highs were interspersed with lows however, and this is where I noticed something very interesting. I …
Sorry doesn’t seem enough
The one hour a week I see my counsellor is the only hour where I feel I lose control of my thoughts and feelings. Sometimes even I’m surprised at what comes pouring out from me because the rest of the time it’s buried so deep within my soul that even I can’t reach it. Somehow, …
Shrink(ing) Violet 